Do you feel you belong at work?
It is a simple question, yet not always an easy one. Even people who lead teams and run businesses can ask it quietly. I do.
Belonging at work is not about fitting in or being the same as everyone else. It is about relationship, responsibility and knowing who you are connected to.
I learned this through a conversation that turned into a whole yarn, which is a deep, unhurried chat. Here is how it went.
How a simple exchange started a big yarn
When we teach about First Nations kinship systems, I sometimes share that I do not always feel I belong.
Aunty Munya is baffled. How could you not belong?
There is a whole yarn in that exchange. It shows two very different ways of seeing connection. It also shows how much we can learn when we stay curious about both.
Family trees and kinship: two ways of seeing connection
I think about the family trees I grew up with. Branches, generations, first cousins, second cousins, third cousins. Even the language describes degrees of separation.
Then Aunty Munya shares the intricate web of First Nations kinship. It holds connections, belonging, roles and responsibilities. It describes who you are in relationship with, how you care for each other, and what is asked of you in return.
Notice the difference. A family tree counts degrees of separation. Kinship asks who you are connected to, and what that asks of you.
Why Indigenous business events feel different
That feeling of kinship is palpable at Indigenous business events. There are connections, community and a sense of working together.
As a micro business owner, I find it pretty special.
That is why our team explores these connections through our Yarns with Indigenous Businesses series. Talise, from our team, has been having these conversations with Indigenous business owners.
And yes, chocolate comes into it.
A chilli chocolate yarn about reciprocity
When Talise mentioned her family’s love of chilli chocolate to Fiona Harrison from Chocolates On Purpose, Fiona joined the dots. “Ahhhh… Carla the chilli chocolate fanatic is your mother!“
But their yarn went much further. Fiona spoke about reciprocity and the relationships behind her chocolate:
- Cacao farmers.
- Aboriginal growers supplying native botanicals.
- Opportunities for people who have too often been excluded.
It is a delicious example of how values shape everyday business decisions. Values shape who we buy from, who we make room for, and what we contribute, as well as what we receive.
What belonging at work could look like
This brings me back to belonging at work.
What might change if we understood ourselves as part of a web of relationships? In that web, each person has something to contribute. Each person also has responsibilities to one another.
This does not mean everyone thinks alike. Nor does it mean work suddenly becomes easy. Instead, it means people know they are part of something, and that what they bring matters.
After all, a workplace is also a set of relationships. How we treat each other, and how we make room for each other, shapes how safe and connected people feel.
Questions to sit with
You do not need to answer these today. Simply notice what comes up.
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What helps me feel I belong at work, and what helps others
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Who am I connected to here, and what does that ask of me?
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Whose contribution do we make room for, and whose do we overlook?
If one question feels uncomfortable, stay with it for a moment. That discomfort often points to where the learning is.
Start your own yarn
There is plenty in this to yarn about.
Think of one colleague, a manager or a team member. Then ask them what helps them feel they belong. You may be surprised by what you hear.
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